Running for Vice President
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Breaking News! Pause your doubting nature and brace yourself. As previously reported, Mark Twain will not Run for Governor of the state of Florida (even if he could have, why would he have bothered with that small potato!). Okay, I know you knew that. Now here’s the big news that’s breaking—thanks for your patience—Mark Twain will run for Vice-President of the USA in 2026 under the guise of—get this—Tim Walz, Governor of Minnesota.
Running for Governor
Mark Twain will soon announce he is Running for Governor of the state of Florida in the November election. OK – you know that's not gonna happen. As iconic as Mark Twain is—a status he’ll forever retain despite having guys like Ron DeSantis ban the books he wrote—he cannot come back from wherever he resides in eternity and run in 2024 because the election for governor of Florida is not until 2026. So, sadly Mr. Twain, as much as you'd like to get your revenge right away, you must drop this idea and try again in two years.
But wait up. Let’s reconsider. You have been convicted, or more correctly, banned from Florida classrooms for being a corrupting influence on youth. Doesn’t your disregard for the rule of law, regardless of whether it be moral or civil, disqualify you from running for office anyway? But then, if that be so, that means you gonna have to forget about running for Florida Governor in 2026 as well. Or maybe for any office whatever whereever it may be.
Mark Twain’s Goal - Bringing Eve & Adam Together
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Mark Twain wanted to bring Eve and Adam together, but his goal went unrealized until after his death. Twain wanted to unite his "creation stories" so Eve and Adam’s different perspectives on creation would stand in high contrast. As Twain said, “They score points against each other — so, if not bound together, some of the points would not be perceived.” In 1931, 21 years after Mark Twain died, Harper finally brought the stories together by publishing a book titled “The Private Life of Adam and Eve”.
In 2024, 87 years after Harper first published the book to satisfy Twain's wishes, Adapted Classics is presenting a FREE PDF version of The Diaries of Eve and Adam in advance the revised reissue of our softcover version of Twain's classic retelling of Genesis whether Mr. Twain would like that or not. No offense, Master! We're still bringing and keeping them togeher as you wished.
Illustrated Literature for Adults — Free PDF
![Illustrated Literature for Adults — Free PDF Illustrated Literature for Adults — Free PDF](images/adaptedclassics/cache/images/adaptedclassics/proportion/P19%20copy_w140_h140/P19%20copy_06121009.png)
Once it was common to see illustrations sprinkled within the pages of novels, but it has always been hard to find fully illustrated literature for adults. The two Mark Twain stories I combined to create “The Diaries of Eve and Adam” (FREE PDF) were notable exceptions. “Extracts from Adam’s Diary”, published in 1904, and “Eve’s Diary”, published in 1906, were hardcover books intended primarily for adult readers and both were fully illustrated, both with illustrations on every other page.
The illustrations in “Extracts from Adam’s Diary” had an abstract, hieroglyphic design. The artist, F. (Frederick) Strothmann, must have chosen this design to create an ancient effect. Or did he choose an abstract design to steer clear of controversy? A conventionally illustrated book about Adam and Eve would depict them unclothed - pre-fall - because that’s how the story goes. But illustrations of nude adults, no matter how discrete, risk offending someone. F. Strothmann may have intentionally avoided taking that risk. Lester Ralph, the illustrator of “Eve’s Diary”, was not so cautious. His illustrations of Adam and Eve are conventional, and they did cause a stir. A library in Charlton MA banned “Eve’s Diary” because library staff objected to the nude depictions of Eve.
Announcing Eve and Adam - Genders in the Garden
Near the end of his life, Mark Twain wrote a series of six stories commonly known as the ‘Adamic Diaries’. Four of the stories poke fun at Christianity and are dark in tone. These stories were not published until after Twain died in 1910. Two of the six stories in the series were published as illustrated books while Twain lived—Extracts from Adam’s Diary in 1904 and Eve’s Diary in 1906. These two stories are less pointed and much lighter in tone. In 2017 I intertwined them in “Mark Twain’s The Diaries of Eve and Adam” by rearranging text and adding a little new material. I have now created a revised edition of this book that features new formatting and additional illustrations. It also carries a new title: simply, The Diaries of Eve and Adam. The paperback will be available for purchase on July 12, 2024.
Purchasing Options for Self-Made Men
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Purchasing options for Self-Made Men have been determined after much reflection and many wrong turns. Straight to the point—you can now purchase a real book that can be held, smelled, and shelved or, if you actually prefer a screen, you can view or download a PDF version at no charge to you. Of course, after seeing the free PDF you might decide to purchase a real book you can hold, smell, and shelve or maybe gift to a person that you love or hate. I am okay with that. Either or both are fine. Whatever you want to do. That will be your choice.
How to Live to be 200
Perhaps you live to be 200 by living an unconventional life. Okay, that won’t work for everyone and it didn’t work for Canadian humorist Stephen Leacock (December 30, 1869 – March 28, 1944). But he did in fact live unconventionally. For at brief intervals throughout his adult life, he stopped thinking altogether. By his own account he never tired of being mentally inert, but he did find it impossible to earn a living in that state of mind, so he regularly left it and resumed professing political economy and chairing the Economics and Political Science Department at McGill University in Montreal, Quebec. Oh, and in the cracks of time that arose while doing these jobs, he also wrote books, essays, and articles on economic theory (and yes, humorous fiction—the only pursuit from which he would earn notable money and recognition). Among his works of humorous fiction are essays like the six we present in our illustrated collection, Self-Made Men, Six Humorous Essays by Stephen Leacock. But then, whenever opportunities presented him with a large enough interval of time, he reentered inertia, his preferred state of being.
Illustrated Leacock Essays
The six humorous, illustrated essays in the soon-to-be-published Self-Made Men by Stephen Leacock are drawn from three separate sources of Leacock material. The title essay, Self-Made Men, was published in 1910 in a collection of essays titled Literary Lapses. This was Leacock’s first venture into collecting and self-publishing his humorous essays, all of which had been first published in a variety of magazines. It was an immediate success, garnering him praise and then a contract with a book publisher. From this first venture he proceeded to have an extremely successful career, mainly writing humorous fiction, but also other works. Between the years 1915 and 1925 he was the most popular humorist in the English speaking world.
Does anyone compare to Mark Twain? Yes!
![Does anyone compare to Mark Twain? Yes! Does anyone compare to Mark Twain? Yes!](images/adaptedclassics/cache/images/adaptedclassics/proportion/SMM23_w140_h140/SMM23_02080240.jpg)
Way up north there was once a Canuck humorist by the name of Stephen Leacock who, as a practicing humorist, was comparable to Mark Twain. Yes indeed, he was. Just as worthy comedians and humorists in the USA are annually awarded the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor, worthy humor writers in Canada are annually awarded the Stephen Leacock Memorial Medal for Humour. And yet, despite his grand reputation, many avid readers in the USA and elsewhere have never heard of Mr. Leacock.
Adapted Classics "Hop-Frog" rated ideal format for Middle School Readers
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We greatly value their opinion. Midwest Book Review is an on-line book review magazine well-respected in the book trade. They selectively review books by small publishers and independent authors. Small players in the book trade, such as ourselves, seek reviews from MBR since almost all review journals will only review books from large publishers.
Eve Illustrated - Literature with Beautiful Curves
![Eve Illustrated - Literature with Beautiful Curves Eve Illustrated - Literature with Beautiful Curves](images/adaptedclassics/cache/images/adaptedclassics/proportion/P23%20copy_w140_h140/P23%20copy_10051013.jpg)
As suggested in “Mark Twain’s the Diaries of Eve and Adam”, and as illustrated by Marc Johnson-Pencook, Eve has beautiful curves. She is lithe, slender, trim, rounded, shapely, nimble, and graceful. Adam looks like a derrick, or maybe architecture. Eve, standing on a rock, head tilted back, watching the flight of a bird in the sky, is beautiful. Adam resembles a reptile.
It’s no surprise that Twain made Eve more physically attractive than Adam. I suppose he could have written a completely farcical story about the first human creatures and made them much different than readers would expect. Instead, he stuck with one of his trademark approaches, humor by exaggeration, and poked fun at feminine and masculine stereotypes. I’m glad he did....
Twain Illustrated that he was Running for Governor
Twain Illustrated contains three funny stories by Mark Twain. All three stories are funny, but one, Running for Governor, is also scary, since it strikes so closely to what is currently happening in the USA and elsewhere. Democracy is in danger because so many people don’t know what to believe in this information/disinformation age of ours. Of course, as the story shows, this phenomenon is not exactly brand new. For most of the nineteenth century, politicians funded major newspapers throughout the US. In 1870, only 11% of urban daily newspapers were independent of corrupt influence by politicians. Twain surely had this in mind while writing Running for Governor for his monthly column in The Galaxy, a literary magazine, in which he portrayed his fictional candidacy for Governor to be just as hopelessly futile as it would have been in fact. Enjoy a Read-Along Video of Running for Governor Here!
Big News! The Midwest Publishers Association (MIPA) has named Twain Illustrated 2023 Winner for Short Story/Anthology
Tolstoy - Radical Christian?
In two previous blogs (here and here), and within the book Tolstoy illustrated, I claimed that Leo Tolstoy formed his worldview based on the teaching of Jesus Christ and that he was a radical Christian.But to identify Tolstoy as a radical Christian requires explanation. First however, there is no doubt that Tolstoy's worldview was based upon a very literal—and thus radical–understanding of the life and teaching of Jesus Christ. Each of the three stories in Tolstoy Illustrated highlight different aspects of Christ's uncommonly iridescent teaching.
Leo Tolstoy –– Fellow Adapter
Fellow adapter? Am I equating myself with Leo Tolstoy? Are you kidding? I don't equate anybody with Leo Tolstoy. He is not only a master, he is the master. I just mean that, besides being the greatest original author of all time, he did adapt stories and tales for publication, just as I do. I adapt classic stories for middle school youth and beyond. This is the way Tolstoy and I are similar. But that’s it. That’s my only comparative claim.
Patriotism
It is beyond dispute that Leo Tolstoy scorned all manner of institutional authority. Each of the three stories in Tolstoy Illustrated hint at different aspects of his disdain, a point-of-view he broadened in other writing to include all conceivable feelings and attitudes that institutions transmit to adherents or victims under their influence or control. In this lightly edited and greatly truncated version of Patriotism and Government, an article he wrote in 1900, here’s what Mr. Tolstoy thought about one such feeling—patriotism.
Are Mark Twain and Leo Tolstoy birds of a feather?
Mark Twain and Leo Tolstoy – birds of a feather? Why would anybody think so? Leo Tolstoy was a radical Christian and Mark Twain was something close to an atheist. Leo Tolstoy was financially secure from the time of his birth until his death, while Mark Twain went broke in his constant pursuit of wealth. Mark Twain was spontaneously sociable, Tolstoy guarded, and at least eventually, something close to reclusive. And yet… their attitudes toward institutional power were nearly identical.
Tolstoy Illustrated
Tolstoy Illustrated: Three Stories by Leo Tolstoy contains three illustrated fables adapted by Leo Tolstoy, then adapted once again by me for the purpose of fitting them with illustrations. Tolstoy adapted these and many other moral fables hoping to convert readers, especially young readers, to genuine Christianity. This was the motive behind most of his literary work from about the age of 50 until the age of 75. Of course, to be honest, as time has played out, he would doubtlessly be gravely disappointed to know how little affect his writing would have inspiring such conversion.
DeSantis versus Twain
Running for Governor
In a matchup for the ages, Mark Twain and Ron DeSantis will be Running for Governor. Should someone ban this contest the way that DeSantis bans books? Yes! Let DeSantis run for President! Plus, Mark Twain would ruin Florida society if he should come back from the dead and win. OK – that's not likely to happen. As iconic as Mark Twain is—or was until guys like DeSantis started banning the books he wrote—he cannot come back and do that. No, no can do. So call off the race. Mark Twain will not run for governor. Besides, he’s been indicted, or more correctly, banned for corrupting youth, so surely he would be disqualified from running for office—right???
View and/or download a FREE PDF version of Twain Illustrated here!
Big News! The Midwest Publishers Association (MIPA) has named Twain Illustrated the Winner for Best Short Story Anthology of 2022!.
Middle School Readers Might Meet Mark Twain
Middle schoolers might meet Mark Twain via his famous adventure novels, maybe Tom Sawyer, probably not Huckleberry Finn. The latter is the second most banned book of all time, chiefly because its language is considered racially insensitive, but also because slavery is a major topic within the framework of the story. That’s a bit of history that many people, including administrators, want to forget ever happened.
Then again, perhaps middle schoolers might meet Twain via his early, harmless short tales like The Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County. Perhaps. But it's hard to believe any middle school readers would meet Mark Twain via his politically controversial works. Knowing there are courageous parents, teachers, and administrators who are unafraid of change or exposing youth to wide-ranging topics and stimulating discussions, I published Twain Illustrated: Three Stories by Mark Twain.
View and/or download a FREE PDF version of Twain Illustrated here!
Big News! The Midwest Publishers Association (MIPA) has named Twain Illustrated finalist for Best Short Story Anthology of 2022!.
Mark Twain Illustrates his Point
Mark Twain illustrates his point well in the story Running for Governor, one of three stories in Twain Illustrated. And what point is that? These days you could easily transpose it to be: Make Fox News pay the price.
Running for Governor is a story that Twain wrote in 1872 for his monthly column in The Galaxy, a literary magazine. It centers on corrupt reporting in newspapers and shows modern readers that misinformation has been freely practiced in the USA for as long as forever.
View and/or download a FREE pdf version of Twain Illustrated here!
Big News! The Midwest Publishers Association (MIPA) has named Twain Illustrated finalist for Best Short Story Anthology of 2022!.